Judging from the title, you may be assuming that this entry is going to be me just looking back on things that have taken place. In a way, I will be but not in the composition that you are expecting.
You see lately the Lord has been dealing with me in the area of security and identity. And I’m beginning to see that we will always be learning more about our identity in every season. As we become more like Christ, our identity is changing to fit His image. As a woman, there is a fine line between confidence and vanity. I know that took a completely different turn than what you were expecting but stay with me. There seem to be two extremes on the spectrum. Vanity, and insecurity. It is a battle to try not to sway to close to either of those, and neither one is healthy. James 4:10 says “ Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.” ESV.
I have been on an exciting but difficult journey over these last 3 months. Striving to have a healthier lifestyle by trying to eat cleaner and work out is easier said than done. And I’m going to be transparent, once I started to see results I found that the full-length mirror became my close friend. After going through a phase of wishing I had a specific body type or build. And longing to be more tone, tanner, stronger I became overly-obsessed with how my body looked. As I have gotten stronger, I have noticed that my motive behind gazing in the mirror has changed from wishing to vanity. I had become prideful of all of the “hard work” and the “discipline” I had put into my dream physique. And I knew that I was not where I wanted to be but I was determined to get there.
This came to a halt when a few days ago I was outside admiring the beautiful sunset. The rainbow-colored skyline edged by both a storm and clear glimpse of the atmosphere above created such vibrant colors not only in the sky but the grass as well. It appeared as though someone had placed an Instagram filter into the sky, but it was real and not modified. I noticed a large puddle in the parking lot and decided to take a cool picture of the sunset reflection. Upon a small thought of it, later on, the Lord spoke to me about the photo I had taken. He didn’t directly speak to me but I knew exactly why he brought it back to my remembrance. So many people, including myself, look at the reflection of something instead of the entire object. Namely our appearance. Think about how many times a day you walk by a mirror, glass door, or window and glance at yourself to make sure you still look “good”.
There is something bigger on the inside of you. Something that God is working on each and every day. And as you submit to His will, you become more like Christ. He wants to show you the things you cannot see when you look in a mirror. He wants to show you how much He loves your heart. Yes, He has made each of us beautiful and unique, but we are equally if not more unique on the inside. He is shaping us as His clay each and every moment.
I have heard it said many times by different people that the Word of God is the best mirror you can have! It shows you how valuable you are on the inside and out. And it strengthens you as your eyes are opened to something about yourself that shouldn’t be there. Just like this issue with me. The last thing I want to be is prideful. The word says that pride comes before the fall. And I encourage you if you are obsessed with how many likes you got on your new selfie you posted or what kind of comments you are getting on it, just let it go. That picture won’t last through eternity. Your spirit will. Imagine how strong you would be spiritually if you put as much time and effort into your quiet time with the Lord as you do on social media. So you say the bible is boring and you don’t know where to start. Begin with Ephesians, that is my favorite. And I pray that the eyes of your spirit would be opened in a new way to receive fresh revelation and understanding. I pray that your spirit would have a new deposit of hunger for the Word, an excitement to spend time studying and learning.